Letters Home Read online

  Title Page

  Copyright

  Dedication

  Quote

  Prologue

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Acknowledgments

  Other books

  About the Author

  Copyright © 2014 by Rebecca Brooke

  Cover Design by Regina Wamba of Mae I Design

  Editing by Ryn Hughes of Delphi Rose

  Interior Design by Kassi Bland Cooper of Kassi’s Kandids Formatting

  All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination or are used factiously, and any resemblance to any actual person, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owner.

  All rights reserved.

  To the men and women who put their lives in danger to protect the freedoms that I hold so dear.

  Where there is love there is life.

  -Mahatma Gandhi

  Words.

  What are words?

  In the most basic of terms, words are a bunch of letters put together…yet words can impact our entire lives. They can make us happy, they can make us sad. They can bring out the best and, unfortunately, the worst in people. Words have an impact like no other.

  Sometimes words can help us see things.

  Like what should have happened.…

  That first moment when you know you’ve met someone special. Someone who could easily hold a place in your heart…

  The boxes labeled “bedroom” sat all around me, waiting to be opened, but there was one box in particular I needed to find. It may have seemed trivial, but there was one thing I needed to make this place feel like home. I pulled the knife from my pocket and sliced the tape on the box closest to me, hoping to find what I was looking for. Unfortunately, that box was full of clothes. After opening a few more boxes, I finally found what I’d been searching for. On the top was a photo that had sat on my nightstand since my senior year of high school. It had been taken during prom, and just seeing it reminded me of the day we met…

  I’d noticed him the moment he walked into the classroom. When you grow up in a small town it’s hard not to notice a new face, especially when it looked like his. He was tall with dark green eyes and blond hair, and definitely not local. Every girl in the room was watching the new guy as he went up and introduced himself to the teacher. Mr. Krinsky handed him his books and pointed to a seat at the back of the room. Slowly, he walked toward his assigned seat, and as his eyes glanced around the room they locked with mine and the whole world fell away. All I could see was him. In that moment, time seemed to freeze. It was as if there was an invisible string tying us together. A string that I wasn’t sure I ever wanted to be broken.

  The clearing of a throat from right behind me made me jump and break the connection. The slight giggle let me know exactly who it was.

  Marissa, my best friend since first grade.

  Watching as the guy moved to his seat, Marissa leaned up from her seat behind me to whisper in my ear, “Better close your mouth before you catch flies.”

  Completely embarrassed that I’d been caught staring, I turned in my seat to look at her. “Thanks,” I muttered.

  “Well, he is hot,” she whispered back, while I stole a quick glance over at our new classmate. Since he was bent over, pulling his books out of his bag, it was safe to look. Melissa was so wrong. Hot wasn’t the word to describe him. Sexy as hell was a better description.

  When he sat back up, I quickly turned around in my seat and, thankfully, Mr. Krinsky started class, giving me a reason to focus on the front of the room. Not that it mattered. My brain was still hopelessly focused on the new boy in the back.

  What just happened?

  The minute our eyes locked, I knew there was something different about him. It was an instantaneous attraction, not that love at first sight crap—because let’s be honest, that stuff is only true in fairy tales—but I couldn’t deny the connection.

  Yet even after the way I’d reacted to him, I was desperately hoping to escape the room as quickly as I could when class was over, and pray that I wouldn’t see him again until the next day, giving me time to get myself together. Lost in my thoughts, I hadn’t realized the bell had rung until Marissa tapped me on the shoulder.

  “Come on, I can’t be late for gym again. Coach Steelman already hates me.”

  As anxious as she’d sounded, being late for class had been the least of my worries. A quick glance over my shoulder and I realized he’d already left the room. Taking my first deep breath in what felt like hours, I quickly packed up my stuff, and even though a part of me was a little sad that I’d missed him leave, the rest of me was jumping for joy.

  “Relax. We’re not going to be late—unless you plan on stopping every few feet to avoid going to gym like you normally do?”

  She rolled her eyes at me. “I just know a lot of people.”

  “Uh huh.”

  Again, it was kind of hard not to know everyone when you lived in a small town like ours.

  “So the new guy,” Marissa said, bumping me with her shoulder as we made our way to the gym.

  “Leave it alone, Marissa”

  “What? I saw the way you were looking at him.”

  There was no doubt in my mind that everyone in the room had seen the way I was looking at him, including him. I felt like such an idiot.

  “He’s gorgeous, but the way I was staring at him he probably thinks I’m some kind of lunatic.”

  “Are you kidding me? Did you fail to notice the way he couldn’t keep his eyes off of you either.”

  “Hi,” a deep baritone said from behind us. A voice I didn’t know, but knew all the same.

  With my stomach starting to flutter, I turned and there he was, leaning against the wall next to the classroom door. Oh God, how much of our conversation had he heard? My face flushed three shades upward of pink and right there, standing in front of him, taking in every inch of his muscular frame, I was rendered speechless. Thankfully, Marissa realized my predicament and covered for me.

  “Hi, I’m Marissa. And you are?”

  “Nate Lewis.”

  He looked at me expectantly, waiting for me to introduce myself. But my tongue still wouldn’t work. Marissa looked at me out of the corner of her eye and smirked. “And my mute friend here is Danielle.”

  “It’s nice to meet you, Danielle,” he said as a crooked smile spread across his face.

  My heart fluttered in my chest. Finally, my voice decided to cooperate

  “Hi, Nate.”

  Normally I was confident and self-assured, but one look from this guy and I was a puddle of mush. Using his foot, he pushed off the wall to stand directly in front of me. His
green eyes, bright with excitement, watched me closely. “I was hoping you could show me to class.”

  This guy wasn’t shy at all and his confidence was just another string pulling me toward him. Then there were those eyes—so vibrant, they reminded me of the color of grass in early summer. It could have been seconds or hours, I don’t know how long I stared at him without answering before Marissa elbowed me in the ribs, making me jump. I would never forget the smile that spread across his lips. It was both warm and welcoming.

  “Um…yeah sure.” My face flushed, as I continued staring at the poor guy.

  “Well…” Marissa cleared her throat again. “I need to stop by my locker before gym, so I’ll meet you there, Danielle.”

  Marissa made a quick getaway in the other direction. My tongue seemed to be permanently wrapped around itself in his presence and I had to walk him to his next class. The situation had “disaster” written all over it.

  “Okay, let’s go.” I started to move in the direction of the gym when I realized that he wasn’t following me, which was weird. “What are you waiting for?”

  “Well, call me crazy, but isn’t it easier to show me where my class is if you know what class I have next?” He smirked.

  Oh my god. This had to be some kind of reality show with a hidden camera because there was no way that anyone could do so many ridiculous things in front of another person without there being some type of joke being played. I knew this was going to be a mess. My eyes dropped to the floor.

  “Oh yeah, where’s your class?” I muttered sheepishly, knowing there was no way I could look him in the face. All I needed to do was get him to his next class, then I could continue with my plan to avoid him at all cost.

  The amusement was clear him his voice. “My schedule says I have gym next.”

  I almost groaned aloud. Only me.

  The hallway felt hotter than normal, but before I could take one step in the direction of the gym, his voice stopped me. A hand curled around my elbow, causing my head to jerk up. “Hey, Danielle, why so jumpy?”

  In no way did I want Nate to think that I didn’t want to be around him. When I noticed the look on his face I felt a sense of calm, and with my embarrassed nerves gone I was able to see how ridiculous I was being. It was like a wake-up call for my confidence—something that had been hiding since he’d walked into the classroom. “I’m sorry, Nate. I’m not normally like this, I guess you just caught me off guard. Can we start over?”

  “I like the sound of that.”

  I reached my hand out to him. “Hi, Nate, I’m Danielle. It’s nice to meet you.”

  He laughed at the gesture, but put his hand in mine anyway. “Hi, Danielle.”

  “I have gym next too. We can walk over there together, if you like?”

  The smile never once left his face. “That works for me.”

  Finally, we started to make our way toward the gym. “So, what brought you here?” the sarcasm in my tone had been ill disguised because I couldn’t imagine why he’d moved to our small town, with its even smaller school. As we walked side by side, Nate explained that his dad had just retired from the army and had wanted to move somewhere quiet.

  “Well, you’ll definitely find quiet here. I can’t think of a place more boring.”

  “Yeah, but sometimes boring is good. I’ve lived in so many different places, the thought of staying in one place permanently, even a quiet one, sounds perfect to me. I’m guessing you grew up here?”

  “Born and raised. There’s not much to see, but I can take you around…if you want?”

  I wanted to smack myself in the head as soon as the words were out of my mouth. Moments before, I’d been struggling to speak in front of him, yet there I was, offering to show him around town.

  When we finally reached the doors to the locker rooms he turned to face me, his eyes bright with happiness. “I’d like that, and for today, how about lunch?”

  I smiled, the first relaxed one since laying eyes on him.

  “Perfect. I’ll meet you back here in an hour.”

  From that moment on we’d been inseparable. It had started off as a simple friendship. We spent our time doing normal things, like having lunch together, or studying for math—by far my worst subject in school but, thankfully, Nate’s best.

  By the months before senior year things had started to change between us. We grew closer over the summer and by Halloween—at the homecoming dance to be specific—he asked me to be his girlfriend, in front of everyone. It hadn’t mattered to Nate that he was different from the other guys his age, and even though I’d never been so embarrassed in my life, there had been no way that I could have said no.

  The best part was that Nate hadn’t changed at all since then. He always did whatever he thought was right, even if sometimes it was out of the ordinary.

  The floorboards in the hallway creaked as I leaned over to place the picture on the nightstand by my side of the bed. When I got up to unpack another box, I noticed Nate standing in the doorway, his arms above his head holding onto the frame.

  “Hey, babe,” he said. ”Are you doing okay in here?”

  “Pretty good. It finally feels like home,” I said, glancing behind me toward the nightstand.

  His gaze followed mine and a smile slowly spread across his face as he moved farther into the room to pick up the picture. “I’ll never understand why you keep this picture. We have so many others that definitely look better.”

  I snatched the picture out of his hands, placing back in its spot. “That isn’t the point.”

  He turned and wrapped his arms around me. “Whatever makes you happy,” he chuckled. “I’m gonna go back to working on the living room.”

  When he left, I sat down on the bed and focused on the photo once again. Although not Nate’s favorite, the photograph was special because of what it represented. Whenever I saw that picture I was reminded of a time when things were simple. A time when our biggest worry was surviving college.

  Some days I wished that had stayed my only worry.

  The realization that your life has started to move in the direction you’d always hoped it would.

  When Nate and I were accepted into the same college, I’d thought life was perfect. I was going to be a lawyer and Nate an architect.

  One day that all changed.

  I’d known Nate wasn’t happy with his major, and there was a small part of me that wondered if he was unhappy with me. While I’d hoped that he just needed to find something that he really loved¸ imagine my surprise when he sat me down and told me what he really wanted to do. Just the thought of that conversation made my hands shake…

  The knock on at the door was only just audible over the music. It surprised me because everyone else was supposed to be in class, so I wasn’t expecting anyone. Getting up from my desk, I made my way over to the door, curious to see who was on the other side. Imagine my surprise when I opened the door to find Nate.

  “Hey, why aren’t you in class?” I said, taking a step back to let him into the room.

  “I had something I had to take care of.”

  He moved across the room to take a seat on my bed and I watched as his knee bounced up and down. That was weird. Usually by now he’d given me a hug, maybe a kiss, or acknowledged me in some other fashion, yet he continued to sit with his forearms resting on his legs and his eyes downcast. Needing to comfort him and figure out what was wrong, I walked over and sat down next to him, sliding my hand down his arm and lacing my fingers with his.

  “Nate, talk to me. What’s wrong?” I asked, my concern growing every moment he stayed quiet.

  Slowly his head lifted, his eyes moving up to meet mine for a brief second before focusing on our clasped hands. Taking a deep breath, he finally began to speak. “Dani, I have something to tell you and it may not be easy to hear.”

  The uncertainty in his voice and the way his eyes wouldn’t focus on mine combined with the words he spoke made my chest feel tight, and I began taking in
short, shallow breaths. What could he possibly want to tell me that he needed to preface it that way?

  In all of the years I’d known him, I’d never seen him like this. In the last few weeks his mood had taken a turn for the worse and our time together seemed to be cut short, with him always having excuses about having work to do—something we used to do together. When he had spent time with me, he’d seemed as if was keeping his distance. Part of me had been waiting for this conversation, yet dreading it at the same time and when he started to speak I was almost certain this was the end of us.

  My throat began to burn as I did my best to hold back my emotions, while I waited for him to finish what he had come to say.

  Nate’s hand squeezed mine and my gaze rose to meet his. I’m not sure what he saw, but whatever it was caused his eyes to widen and he rushed to reassure me. “Dani, I’m not sure what’s going on in your head, but knowing you, it’ll be some delusional idea that I’m breaking up with you. That’s not it. You have to know by now that I’d never leave you.”

  Unable to speak past the lump in my throat, I simply nodded and waited for him to continue. He pulled me in close to his body and held steady. I hadn’t realized that I was shaking all over.

  Once my tremors had subsided, he moved me away from him to look me in the eye. “But I am going to need to go away for a while.”

  “I don’t understand.”

  He squeezed my hand even tighter. “You know over the last few months I’ve been unsure about what to do with my life, right?”

  The weight that had been sitting on my chest lifted as I realized Nate must have finally decided on a new major, and I was dying to know what it was. I still didn’t understand why he’d have to go away, but I figured maybe it was something that required a semester abroad. In my excitement I jumped up from the bed, clasping my hands together in front of me.

  “Oh my God, you picked a new major! What is it? Do you have to do a semester abroad? That’s so exciting. I wonder where they might send you—”

  He reached out, taking my hand in his to stop my rambling.